Happy Birthday

I love my birthday. I love my birthday much more as an adult than I ever did as a child, and I really loved it as a child.
My birthday is the 4th of July, which means it’s shared with everyone in the USA. The great part is that most people have the day off and are expecting a party. The bad part is, well, I guess there is no bad part. It’s a great day to have a birthday.
When I was little we always had a party with barbecue chicken, potato salad, and cake. My mom made the best cakes. I usually requested white cake with strawberry filling and she’d cover it in butter cream that would melt in your mouth. She made the most beautiful roses from butter cream and she’d put them all over my cake. They were almost too pretty to eat. Almost.
I don’t make barbecue chicken anymore. Mostly because no one in my family like barbecue sauce. I make a cake, although this year I made a pound cake. But we still party. We invite friends and family and we just enjoy the day.
I think the enjoyment part is why I love my birthday so much. There was a time, 17 years ago, when I thought I would never feel joy again. In the months after my mom’s suicide I slipped into a place so dark and engulfing that I wasn’t sure I’d ever make it out. My life was in danger and I didn’t know how to climb out.
God is good though. He picked me up from the mire and I am not just surviving but I am living. I am blessed beyond measure with a loving husband and precious children. I have great friends who love me and stand with me every day. God is using me to bless others.
My birthday stands as a reminder to me that God is faithful and loving and that I matter to him. It is an anniversary of life and life is a gift. It’s a gift that shouldn’t be squandered, which is why I strive every day to be the woman God has created me to be. I want to learn and grow and know more about who he is. I want to experience his love richly and I want to share that love with others. And if that means I have a kick-off party each year that includes sparklers and cake…then it’s all the sweeter.

2 Replies to “Happy Birthday”

  1. I’m so glad you are writing again and that I found your blog. I’ve thought of you often since Robin Williams death and how difficult that must have been for you to hear all the comments about suicide (the hurtful ones). Miss you and love you!

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